Authenticity: The Quiet Revolution Within

An authentic No, is far more powerful than a pretentious Yes. 

Most of us spend our lives trying to be "good."  

We want to be a good daughter, a good husband, a good wife, a good son.  

We follow the value system passed down to us because:  

a) we were too young to question it

b) it sort of works, and reinforces itself.

But here’s the thing—these values are often fake. 

They are based on false humility, and therefore they inspire true selfishness.

This is why we want to be well-wishers and do-gooders in society, all the while keeping an eye to make sure no one is getting ahead of us.

We are wishing each other well, smiling and sharing pleasantries, all the while burning with jealousy and envy within.

We are trying to be kind and generous, all the while wondering when will it be our turn, to receive what we gave.

It is time to question these so called values, and it is time to doubt whether doing good, being kind, polite and acquiescing to others is indeed the right way to live.

These values are the reason we become people-pleasers and validation-seekers.

We deprioritize saying "No" because we want to please others, because we are supposed to do that.

We are supposed to be accepted, understood, appreciated, and lauded. 

Society has conditioned us to follow rules, even when those rules don’t feel right for us.  

In this way, society becomes immoral because it imposes its own morality on its members. 

It takes away our choice to distinguish right from wrong, good from bad, and love and acceptance from prejudice and hate.

By doing so, it robs us of our authenticity.  

We lose the ability to think for ourselves because we’re handed a decision-making system that was never fully designed or vetted by us.  

A lot of the conflict we see within ourselves comes from the behaviors we learned in childhood—to be polite, kind, and to be good to others—which are the fake values of this immoral society.  

In trying so hard to follow these prewritten scripts, we lose sight of what it means to be true.  

We stop asking:  

Who am I, really?  What does it actually mean to be good? Why should I be nice to others?

What do I want to say, feel, or do—right now, in this moment?  

Because being authentic is not about being good or bad, kind or rude, being a follower or a leader, at all. It is about being true to what's real within you.

It is to take the right action, in that moment, fully aligned with your true self. 

Authenticity begins when we stop lying to ourselves.  

It starts when we see ourselves clearly, without criticizing or praising.  

Without trying to change who we are.

When we stop lying to ourselves, we reclaim our power to act authentically.  

We realize we don’t need to do more. We don’t need to try harder.  

We simply need to do what is necessary, what is appropriate.

No more. No less.  

For example:  

• Saying "No" to a responsibility if it is affecting your mental health, or other higher priority responsibilities.
• Speaking your truth in a relationship, at the right moment, in the right way, such that it resolves conflict creatively.  
• Turning some people away in a way that feels unforced and natural, when your Intuition says you should.

An authentic person will never enable or disable someone else.

They realize that an authentic NO is more powerful than a pretentious YES.

An authentic person cannot exploit others for personal gain. 

Their dealings with friends and families are spontaneous, and restricted to what’s necessary, appropriate and fair.

There is no ulterior motive in their actions. There is no thought of winning arguments or debates, or playing small Egoic games.

They are focused on taking Right Action, because Right Action is always precise and therefore, enough.

Right Action lies at the harmony of Intuition and Intellect, of Reason and Love.

It does not linger. Does not create doubt, regret or confusion once it's taken.

It finishes the deed it started, and moves on without an afterthought.

When we live this way, something beautiful happens in our relationships too.  

If we are kind and generous, it is always unintentional.

If we help and assist someone, it never has a motive.

Like a flower that gives its fragrance indifferent to who stops by, my actions flow into this world, dispassionately, treating everyone the same.

I do not get attached to my actions, or regret taking them.

I do not expect anything to be returned, for I gave because our giving was natural.

My relationship to you is no longer transactional, for I was simply being - Me.

It is because I don’t need anything from you that I can be authentic with you, that I can Love you.

Authenticity allows us to live in alignment—not with what society demands, but with what life asks of us in each moment.  

Now, let me ask you,  

Do you ever feel trapped by some of these rules?  

What would it look like to break free and make decisions that feel true to you?  

No more.  

No less.  

Just as nature intended.  

- with gratitude,

Amit