Self doubt


Even the smartest of the people I know have self-doubt. Why do we question ourselves so much? Absolute certainty in all situations is a sign of delusion, but so is constant self-doubt. Is there a deep insecurity in us? Something so subtle that it is almost untouchable by conscious thinking. An insecurity which is born out of pressures we put on ourselves, or by emulating someone we think is successful?

Why do we idolize someone and judge them worthy to be emulated? There is great security in fame, wealth, success, and power. We observe these in others and wish it for ourselves. We choose not to accept what we already have, which may be enough but seek out more and more. This reinforces the idea that there is something lacking in us.

Why should we succeed in the eyes of the world, when our definition of success is based on standing apart from the herd? Is success to be the same as others or being different? We want to be exclusive and stand apart from others. In other words, we want to be better than them, even above them in some respect. Thus, in reality, we despise them. Why else would we want to be different?

Success then is a desire to be admired in the eyes of those we despise. Self-doubt is a result of trying to be better than those we reserve our contempt for. Why should we impress those whose opinions matter the least to us? This contradiction is at the heart of all self-doubt. Seeking admiration from those who we think little of.

What happens when you seek no approval from others? What happens when there is no pressure on yourself to succeed in order to stand out? Is there any self-doubt then?

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